Tyler's Tattles

Jake here: I think I need a translator. Last night mommy was standing in the family room and I walked up to her and said, "Aaahhhww." She bent down PICKED ME UP and tried to fling me across her shoulder while saying, "Oh Jakie, so you want me to pick you up?" I tensed my body up in a ball and corrected her, "Eeeeeeeeeaaaahhhhhhhwwwwww." I even looked her straight in the eye to let her know I was serious. Finally she put me back on the floor where I belonged, thank goodness. And I repeated my original command of, "Aaahhww," she reached down and scratched my back the way I like it. Now why didn't she just do that in the first place? Does anyone know of a good translator of kitty to English? I think my mom may need some help.